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By David Ives

The area in keeping with David Ives is a really upload position, and his performs represent a digital rigidity try of the English language -- and of the audience's potential for disorientation and enjoyment. Ives's characters plunge into black holes known as "Philadelphias," the place the easiest wishes are hilariously thwarted. Chimps named Milton, quick, and Kafka are locked in a room and made to re-create Hamlet. And a con guy peddles classes in a doubtful language within which "hello" interprets as "velcro" and "fraud" comes out as "freud."

At as soon as captivating and puzzling, incisively clever and side-splittingly humorous, this unique paperback variation of Ives's performs comprises "Sure Thing," "Words, phrases, Words," "The common Language," "Variations at the dying of Trotsky," "The Philadelphia," "Long in the past and much Away," "Foreplay, or The paintings of the Fugue," "Seven Menus," "Mere Mortals," "English Made Simple," "A Singular Kinda Guy," "Speed-the-Play," "Ancient History," and "Philip Glass Buys a Loaf of Bread."

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And bye-bye Utopia. RUTH: you recognize that’s why Bob and Sandy went to Aruba. JACK: to hitch a kibbutz? RUTH: To make a toddler. JACK: Oh. RUTH: We’re now not twenty-five years outdated anymore, Jack. JACK: So I pay attention. (Pause. ) JACK: good pay attention, try to be your skinny, witty and fascinating self in approximately fifteen mins, so you’d greater get it jointly. humans will imagine we’ve been having a significant dialog or whatever. RUTH: We do celebrate jointly, don’t we. JACK: convinced. We’re pals. It’s a brand new idea in relationships. buddies and fans at the same time rather than consecutively. the way in which issues are meant to be in that global with out canned spaghetti or toupees. have in mind? So whats up. in view that we're such sturdy neighbors … you wanna fuck, good friend? RUTH: Ohhhhhhhhh no … (She strikes away and he pursues. ) JACK: Come on, only a quickie. RUTH: Why does this constantly take place correct sooner than a celebration? JACK: I won’t even take my pants off. We’ll do it Polish-style. RUTH: escape from me, you fiend! JACK: All you should do is reduce your panties and we will be able to do it at the ground. RUTH: We’re consistently past due for issues due to this. JACK: One final fuck. RUTH: precisely. JACK: simply we’ll make it quickly and steamy rather than the standard gradual and luscious. RUTH: you usually say that and we’re constantly forty-five mins past due. JACK: We’ve by no means regretted it but. RUTH: you'll want to cope with this power horniness. JACK: It’s my tragic flaw. Horniness is subsequent to tardiness. (Suddenly pointing within the air as a diversionary tactic. ) glance! (As she seems there, he dives around the mattress to seize her, yet she jumps again, eluding him. ) RUTH: Everybody’s coming right here this time. We can’t preserve them ready on the door. JACK: We’ll enable ’em in they usually can watch. RUTH: Jack … JACK: It’ll be the genuine factor, correct in entrance in their eyes. The zipless fuck. The beatific imaginative and prescient. the second one coming. Or 3rd or fourth. So come on, what do you assert? Huh? Hm? Huh? mattress? intercourse? mattress? RUTH: Will you ever develop up? JACK: Nope. Come on. You’ll like it. So will I. RUTH: Do you promise we’ll be fast? JACK: Scout’s honor. Ten mins or less than. RUTH: One foot at the flooring continually? JACK: And either palms at the ceiling. RUTH: You’re on. (They begin to undress. The doorbell earrings. They cease. ) JACK: lets nonetheless do it particularly speedy. RUTH: Sorry, friend. destiny has spoken. JACK: Oh my balls are going to be sapphire blue all evening. RUTH: solid. They’ll fit my sneakers. JACK: should you see me jogging humorous, you’ll comprehend why. RUTH: simply preserve your legs crossed. JACK: And it’ll be your fault. (Doorbell. ) RUTH: only a minute! JACK: final probability. RUTH: Down, Casanova. And have in mind what I stated. JACK: What did you are saying? RUTH: Are you prepared to stand the area? Balls tucked in? JACK: you could hearth whilst prepared, Grisley. BLACKOUT ACT simply after the celebration. Streamers and confetti everywhere in the flooring. JACK: Wooooeeee! RUTH (jive talk): all people lookin’ sturdy! (They jitterbug a few steps. ) JACK: nice occasion, Pinkerstein. RUTH: Oh you think that so? JACK: I do, I do, I do. I certainly do. The bash of the yr. RUTH: all people appeared to have an all-right time, o.k..

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